Comments on: Late http://martha.freepressblog.org/2004/07/11/late/ Martha's blog Wed, 07 Jan 2009 20:18:57 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.6.5 By: dr. stryker http://martha.freepressblog.org/2004/07/11/late/#comment-32 dr. stryker Fri, 16 Jul 2004 01:07:00 +0000 http://martha.freepressblog.org/2004/07/11/late/#comment-32 maybe people aren't striving to change because they don't realize there's something wrong. if no one told them they're being selfish, they might not know it. common sense isn't as common as we'd like, especially in our melting pot. it's just as unfair to dismiss them as selfish as it is to dismiss your own selfishness as "just the way i am." maybe people aren’t striving to change because they don’t realize there’s something wrong. if no one told them they’re being selfish, they might not know it. common sense isn’t as common as we’d like, especially in our melting pot. it’s just as unfair to dismiss them as selfish as it is to dismiss your own selfishness as “just the way i am.”

]]> By: Martha http://martha.freepressblog.org/2004/07/11/late/#comment-31 Martha Fri, 16 Jul 2004 00:20:00 +0000 http://martha.freepressblog.org/2004/07/11/late/#comment-31 I think your examples are exactly what I am talking about as exceptions, minus the friend calling one...tell them you'll have to call them back or on your cell phone - you are late for a meeting, dinner, etc. I just feel its very self centered to say that it doesn't matter what YOU had planned, my overloaded life takes precedence. I agree about the whole selfishness thing and I hate it in myself as well, but that is how we start out in this life and hopefully come to realize and work to change. I just don't see a lot of people who strive to change. I can't stand the "that's just the way i am" mantality,basically to me its saying "screw it if you don't like it or it rubs you the wrong way. That's your problem." Thanks for posting, I love hashing this out! I think your examples are exactly what I am talking about as exceptions, minus the friend calling one…tell them you’ll have to call them back or on your cell phone - you are late for a meeting, dinner, etc. I just feel its very self centered to say that it doesn’t matter what YOU had planned, my overloaded life takes precedence. I agree about the whole selfishness thing and I hate it in myself as well, but that is how we start out in this life and hopefully come to realize and work to change. I just don’t see a lot of people who strive to change. I can’t stand the “that’s just the way i am” mantality,basically to me its saying “screw it if you don’t like it or it rubs you the wrong way. That’s your problem.” Thanks for posting, I love hashing this out!

]]> By: dr. stryker http://martha.freepressblog.org/2004/07/11/late/#comment-30 dr. stryker Thu, 15 Jul 2004 23:29:00 +0000 http://martha.freepressblog.org/2004/07/11/late/#comment-30 i'm sorry if this sounds like an excuse. i acknowledge i'm different than most other people and am just trying to figure out why. i don't think it has to do with the way you're raised because my mom is the biggest clock watcher in the world. well, maybe i'm rebelling against her?<br /><br />i really want to stress that i'm not the type of person that doesn't call when i'm gonna be late. i try hard to let people know. if you catch me not, call me on it to my face.<br /><br />when i talk about ebb and flow, i'm not talking about my own whims. i'm talking about not getting all stressed out when my daughter barfs all over her clothes, or when i go out to my car and see that i have a flat tire, or when a friend i haven't talked to in a long time calls me up as i'm walking out the door. i'm also talking about having some grace when that stuff happens to other people. i think respecting other's time is important, but life just doesn't run on the clock...as much as we'd like to regulate it. i’m sorry if this sounds like an excuse. i acknowledge i’m different than most other people and am just trying to figure out why. i don’t think it has to do with the way you’re raised because my mom is the biggest clock watcher in the world. well, maybe i’m rebelling against her?

i really want to stress that i’m not the type of person that doesn’t call when i’m gonna be late. i try hard to let people know. if you catch me not, call me on it to my face.

when i talk about ebb and flow, i’m not talking about my own whims. i’m talking about not getting all stressed out when my daughter barfs all over her clothes, or when i go out to my car and see that i have a flat tire, or when a friend i haven’t talked to in a long time calls me up as i’m walking out the door. i’m also talking about having some grace when that stuff happens to other people. i think respecting other’s time is important, but life just doesn’t run on the clock…as much as we’d like to regulate it.

]]> By: Anonymous http://martha.freepressblog.org/2004/07/11/late/#comment-29 Anonymous Thu, 15 Jul 2004 22:11:00 +0000 http://martha.freepressblog.org/2004/07/11/late/#comment-29 Nathan; Your post sounds like a bit fat freaking excuse. Being on time has nothing to do with societal regulations. It has to do with keeping commitments and respecting other people. And don't tell me that you're going with the "eb and flow" of life! Thats crap. If you're just going with the flow then don't make time commitments and you won't be late. Otherwise suck it up and get there when you said you would! Nathan; Your post sounds like a bit fat freaking excuse. Being on time has nothing to do with societal regulations. It has to do with keeping commitments and respecting other people. And don’t tell me that you’re going with the “eb and flow” of life! Thats crap. If you’re just going with the flow then don’t make time commitments and you won’t be late. Otherwise suck it up and get there when you said you would!

]]> By: Martha http://martha.freepressblog.org/2004/07/11/late/#comment-28 Martha Thu, 15 Jul 2004 21:53:00 +0000 http://martha.freepressblog.org/2004/07/11/late/#comment-28 I know what you are saying, but when our "ebb and flow" is effecting others we really need to check it. I guess in many circumstances flexibility is ok, but when lateness makes others suffer, it really should stop. And if I never hear the phrase "better late than never" again, I'll be a happy girl! It's a stewardship thing, I think, just like your money, take care of your time. If you can't make it, don't say you'll be there. And as always, there are unusual circumstances. We must allow for those. I gues I was raised to be early...maybe its genetic. Who knows. I know what you are saying, but when our “ebb and flow” is effecting others we really need to check it. I guess in many circumstances flexibility is ok, but when lateness makes others suffer, it really should stop. And if I never hear the phrase “better late than never” again, I’ll be a happy girl! It’s a stewardship thing, I think, just like your money, take care of your time. If you can’t make it, don’t say you’ll be there. And as always, there are unusual circumstances. We must allow for those. I gues I was raised to be early…maybe its genetic. Who knows.

]]> By: dr. stryker http://martha.freepressblog.org/2004/07/11/late/#comment-27 dr. stryker Thu, 15 Jul 2004 18:38:00 +0000 http://martha.freepressblog.org/2004/07/11/late/#comment-27 sorry about all the typos up there...i was a bit flustered when i wrote it. sorry about all the typos up there…i was a bit flustered when i wrote it.

]]> By: dr. stryker http://martha.freepressblog.org/2004/07/11/late/#comment-26 dr. stryker Thu, 15 Jul 2004 18:35:00 +0000 http://martha.freepressblog.org/2004/07/11/late/#comment-26 i'd like to think we call when our lateness is going to effect someone. i haven't in the past (the waaay past) but i'd like to think i've learned our lessons. seems like most things don't require you to be on time. work, movies, getting together for meals, etc.<br /><br />alison- your post read really angry, i'm sorry if i pissed you off. time regiments don't feel very naturally to me. life is so fluid, it seems unnatural to impose artificial regulations on activities. at the same time i know that society has set up a system and i must learn to live by that system. i try to be courtious and i'd like to be a person that others can count on. at the same time, i want to allow myself to bend with the eb and flow of life. i guess i'm conflicted in this way. the last thing i want to be is selfish, but i keep finding new ways in which i am. selfishness is the thing i hate most about myself. i’d like to think we call when our lateness is going to effect someone. i haven’t in the past (the waaay past) but i’d like to think i’ve learned our lessons. seems like most things don’t require you to be on time. work, movies, getting together for meals, etc.

alison- your post read really angry, i’m sorry if i pissed you off. time regiments don’t feel very naturally to me. life is so fluid, it seems unnatural to impose artificial regulations on activities. at the same time i know that society has set up a system and i must learn to live by that system. i try to be courtious and i’d like to be a person that others can count on. at the same time, i want to allow myself to bend with the eb and flow of life. i guess i’m conflicted in this way. the last thing i want to be is selfish, but i keep finding new ways in which i am. selfishness is the thing i hate most about myself.

]]> By: Allison http://martha.freepressblog.org/2004/07/11/late/#comment-25 Allison Wed, 14 Jul 2004 06:03:00 +0000 http://martha.freepressblog.org/2004/07/11/late/#comment-25 Over-committed my ass. That's just a lame excuse selfish people use to cover up the fact that they think their life and their time is more important than the person waiting. It's one thing if you call or something happened but people who are consistenly late are just plain RUDE. Over-committed my ass. That’s just a lame excuse selfish people use to cover up the fact that they think their life and their time is more important than the person waiting. It’s one thing if you call or something happened but people who are consistenly late are just plain RUDE.

]]> By: dr. stryker http://martha.freepressblog.org/2004/07/11/late/#comment-24 dr. stryker Mon, 12 Jul 2004 20:25:00 +0000 http://martha.freepressblog.org/2004/07/11/late/#comment-24 try this on for size: in islamic culture, everyone is late. why? because today might be your last day on earth, so why put off doing anything? when you run into a friend, you should stop, talk, buy them a drink. so then you're late to whatever you were heading off to do. it's just an understood part of culture.<br /><br />to answer your question...we're too overcommitted and so we're late to almost everything. try this on for size: in islamic culture, everyone is late. why? because today might be your last day on earth, so why put off doing anything? when you run into a friend, you should stop, talk, buy them a drink. so then you’re late to whatever you were heading off to do. it’s just an understood part of culture.

to answer your question…we’re too overcommitted and so we’re late to almost everything.

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